Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
