She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
