What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
