Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
