make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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