i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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