I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
