Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I supernannyed him into submission
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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