And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
