I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
