check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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