I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
