The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just forgot I was standing up.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
