battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
