I don't think brook has ever known best
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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