So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
