tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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