first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize