i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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