Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
