Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
