he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
