i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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