it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i just google imaged poop.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
