Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Randomize
