you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
