Got a toothbrush?
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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