So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
