I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
