glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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