why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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