Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
its liver damage thursday
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize