It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
