This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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