you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
