Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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