Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
