im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Randomize
