what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I just googled if crying burns calories
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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