chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
