Porn is love you can see.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I think people are normalizing furries
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
