so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
