im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
