i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
