Buhtt sex?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
