I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
