people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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