The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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