I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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