Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
